I listened to you when you were depressed, heeded your advice, respected you, looked up to you, treated you like a best friend, even shed tears for you, everything. You call yourself a friend when you've treated me this way? If that's the case, I have no wish to be your best friend, I'd rather just have a bunch of acquaintances.
What's a best friend supposed to be like anyway?
Sometimes I think I'm too nice, sometimes I think I give way to you too much, sometimes I even allow you to throw tantrums at me when it's obviuosly not my fault, sometimes I even think you're taking advantage of me but I always tell myself that you're nice to me because we're genuinely friends. I was living in self denial. Now, I was so silly into thinking that you were genuine.
Rah, I should just tell you to fuck off like what they said, but at the end of the day, I won't do that, cos I love you too much and I care for you too much to leave you to rot. Maybe you do love me, but you just don't show it. Oh fuck, I'm slipping into my self-denial mode again.
When you were in pain over the one you love, over your family, over your other friends, over your social life, over your school life, over anything, I was always there for you. But right now, especially now, I'm suffering like fuck, I do not lead a picture perfect life, but were you ever there for me? Will you be there for me? Question your heart, question yourself whether you love me half as much as I love you. No, right?
I'll just end here, I'll leave you at that. If you think this entry is directred at you, then, it's directed at you. If you wanna know who it's directed at, ask me, not make fucked up comments behind my back.
I might be rather angsty now, but it's because I'm upset. I still love you and have always cared.
BimboQueen
5/10/2005 07:18:00 pm
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The BimboQueen
Serene Loo;
Femme;
19 September 1987;
Nineteen going on Twenty;
Mass Communication Graduate;
Account Management Executive;
Nightlife;
Retail therapy & more retail therapy;
Very trigger happy;
hayzelle@hotmail.com
