yayness, it's already thursday. i can't wait for the weekend to come. i've been having a very busy and stressful week. actually, all of us in T106 and probably the entire mass comm are feeling really stressed right now. i think i might just get a mental breakdown and crumble under all the stress. but since the weekend's coming, i am feeling sooo much more comforted.
on tuesday, beni and i met up to do the proposal essay thingie. and yah, we managed to get work done. yay, cheers to the Benis.
me and mabes managed to submit our protools assignment on time. we were hysterical when we thought we were not going to finish it. mabes was really nice, cos i was happened to be going through a shitty time during our radio slot. and yah, she did more of the work. i feel guilty hun! thanks for being there for me when i felt like knocking my head against the wall of the DAWS room.
wednesday was IS day. jon called in sick. he had tummy ache. so, there was only me, darryl, hanni and mabes. and we had des wee's class. he's so hotttt. such a sweetie pie. and jon: i was not ogling at des wee okay. i ain't lusty. y-o-u are lusty! ps: i had a great time yesterday, baby. *winks*
okay, now for the emotional part of my entry...
saylin, i really don't know what to say. i know you care alot about me. i know i do things without thinking. i know i am tempted very easily by just anything. as you said, i have changed from secondary school days. now, i've changed into a person i would have hated back then. you've got me thinking about so many things. you've made me hate myself. and in a way, it's probably a good thing, so i won't start doing stupid things again. i promise i'll think hard before doing something really stupid next time. you've made me realise that you actually care. that you really care. and i feel so blessed to have you in my life. *hugs saylin* you made my day. and i know my assuarance is not enough. i'll work hard to try not to screw my life up again.
xinghui girlie wurlie, thanks for worrying about me on my part. i know the history of guys i've fallen for makes you damn worried... but i'll take care of myself and i won't indulge in worldly pleasures. and i will love myself and i won't do anything to harm myself. you made me cry, did you know? i always thought you were so wrapped up in your own life now that we're actually drifting apart. but now i know that's not true. i know you'll be there for me. i know i can count on you to be there to listen to me. you are truly an asset to bimbo madness tm. i just hope this nightmare will come to an end soon. i know they'll never forgive me. i know that's something i gotta live with for the rest of my life. and all those flashbacks of the past, might be something good actually, if you know what i mean. it might deter me from doing something stupid right. i know you aren't having a very easy time now. but you still worry for me. i know you still think of him now and then. i am sorry i can't help you. all i can say is, "let go and just go on with life. he doesn't deserve you. you deserve somebody much much better. somebody who will treasure you and love you even more." i care for you girlie. and i'll always be here for you. even at 3am in the morning when you feel shitty and you feel like you wanna cry, i am just a phonecall away. i love you very much!
weikean, where did you disappear to? why can't i feel our closeness anymore? i have so many things to tell you... so many things i want to cry to you about. so many things i've been suffering in silence about. i want you to be a part of my life. i want us to be best friends. =( you never read my blog. so you'll never know.
i know i might not be able to accept or believe whatever you tell me now. i have been hurt, you know that. i am scared. i am afraid. i am jealous. i am emotional.
as you said, time will tell and it'll all take time. so, we'll just leave it at that okay?
and to those who do not mind my past and my stupid mistakes. and who still cares for me the way you used to care for me, who does not look at me differently just because of that, who accepts me for who i am, i just want you to know i love you!
oh boy, oh boy. do i feel lucky tonight to have people around me who care so much about me.
i should never say i feel unloved again. cos you and you and you and you and you and you you you You care for me.
BimboQueen
9/16/2004 01:32:00 am